The good part about a big city is that you have choices. However, one of the best ways to meet women in a big city is to get involved in some sort of charitable cause that is centered on the gay community. If you're more grassroots, go where the hippies are.
I met my wife online, and if you want to know more about how to successfully date on the Internet, read my previous column, "Juicy Jincey's Guide to Online Dating: Finding Love or Just a One-Night Stand." Right now I'm talking about how to meet women and in your day-to-day life.
The first and most important thing when you want to find love is to be open.
It is very helpful to hang out with lesbians, because you will increase your chances of finding someone with whom you have chemistry. If you don't already live in that area of town, consider moving there, or at a minimum, go hang out there.
The point is to maximize your potential for meeting women who like women.
How to Meet Hotties in Your Own Tiny Town I may be a big-city girl now, but I grew up in Carrollton, Ga., a place so small that the entire population would fill up less than half of Yankee Stadium. Aside from the fact that you will have no designated driver, you may come across as desperate.
Despite it being tiny, there gay people there who hang out and do gay things. You may feel comfortable hanging out with your buddy, but the problem is that women in the bar will think that you came with your man-friend as a date. Trust me, I made that mistake more times than anything else.
Don't spend all your time with gay men if you want to meet a woman.
Ditto for straight people, unless they are setting you up or your group of friends is very diverse.
If you live in a one-stoplight kind of town, then there may not be a gay bar, but I would lay money down on the fact that there is one somewhere close by in the county. The more people you chat with, the more your confidence will be boosted. If you have chemistry with someone, exchange phone numbers. Don't be a douche and go around getting everyone's digits. When you meet someone at a bar, wait two days to call for a date.
Another mistake I have made over and over is trying to make an instant "deep connection." I despise small talk, so I'm always attempting to carry on intellectual conversations with everyone. If you call the morning after meeting them, you will look like a stalker.
Do not say, "There are no gay women where I live." That is most certainly untrue.